Category Archives: Family & Relationships

How To Reach Out To Someone During The COVID-19 Pandemic

We have different struggles in fighting the battle against COVID-19 – some find it easier to deal with the outbreak, while others are fighting for their lives. Whatever the case is, checking up on the mental health of your friends and family members is needed more than ever during this crisis. You don’t have to be a mental health expert to reach out to someone suffering from anxiety or depression. Here are some ways how you can help.

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Pick Up The Phone

It’s difficult to check up on your friends and loved ones because you can’t see them face-to-face because of the COVID-19 crisis. Observe what they are trying to convey in your conversation or what they post online. According to Dr. Arthur Cassidy, Ph.D., “It shouldn’t be intensive monitoring. Just make a scale from 1 to 10 to determine how you think they are feeling, one being happy, 10 being abnormally reserved, and unhappy.”

If you notice that there’s something unusual with their behavior, it is time to pick up the phone and try to ask them sensitively how they are feeling. It may be through messaging your loved ones on social media, video calling them, or texting. This simple act shows that you are ready to listen to them.

You Don’t Need To Say Anything

When your friend is confessing their feelings, it doesn’t necessarily mean you have to fix their problem or give them advice on how to deal with their struggles. It is enough that there is someone who can lend an ear and will take their situation seriously. But reassure your friend that what they share is strictly confidential.

It is also crucial for you to listen to them non-judgmentally. Pay attention to what your friends are saying and show them that you genuinely care about them.

Make Them Feel They’re Not Alone

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Reassure them that everything will be alright, and it is reasonable to experience fear, anxiety, and sadness in this trying time. Tell your friends that they are not alone in this struggle. Your support can go a long way to your loved one; so, remind them that help is available, and you are always there for them no matter what happens.

Keep Your Loved Ones Healthy and Active

We always grab our jar of Nutella or bag of chips whenever we’re sad or stressed. While these foods give us comfort, getting into this eating habit does not make us better in the long run. Eating healthy food can bring out a healthier mind and body.

If your friend is on the cycle of eating unhealthy food or being a couch potato, help them get out of this bad habit by showing them fun and healthy recipes they could try. You can also video-call them and schedule a yoga or workout session together. 

Be Patient

You must understand that people have their reasons why they find it difficult to ask for help. Do not force them to talk to you, as this may make them feel uncomfortable and helpless. Just keep an open line to your loved ones in case they reach out to you for help. 

Remind That They Can Seek Professional Help

Encourage your loved one to seek professional help. Thankfully, there are several mental health professionals all over that offer online therapy sessions during this pandemic. Mental health professionals can help them better in dealing with anxiety or depression while maintaining social distancing.

Take Care Of Yourself As Well

As much as you want to listen to your friend’s problems, you might get upset too. Take a step back if it causes you distress, and don’t forget to be kind to yourself. Trying to do something that you find enjoyable or relaxing—everyone’s mental health matters, whether there’s a pandemic or not.

Stepping Toward Mental Health And Happiness

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Combatting anxiety or depression during the COVID-19 pandemic becomes difficult because you cannot reach out to your loved ones physically. But hopefully, these ways mentioned above can alleviate the pain you and your friends are feeling.

Even when the situation we have right now is requiring us to distance ourselves from each other physically, do not forget that there are lots of options to connect and still be together.

How To Have A Long-Lasting Relationship 

Many people want to live happily ever after kind of ending. The first logical step towards that goal is to have a long-lasting relationship. This kind of relationship has been elusive for some. They are often questioning themselves and where they have gone wrong. They even go so far in believing that they are never good enough.  

 

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  Continue reading How To Have A Long-Lasting Relationship 

Things To Know Before Marrying A Lupus Patient 

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So, have you either proposed or thought of proposing to your girlfriend who bravely faces lupus as we speak? 

The fact that you are paying attention to this post must mean that the wedding bells are about to ring for you and your beloved. It is a wondrous thing – love is – and you are lucky to find each other. 

Continue reading Things To Know Before Marrying A Lupus Patient 

Can You Survive A Divorce?

Finding out that your marriage is about to crumble can be the most heartbreaking moment of your life. You will start to wonder how things can fall apart even if your relationship started with the sweetest and most lovable story. Unfortunately, psychology tells us that people can change even if you do not expect it to happen. The truth is that you will begin to realize that your husband is not the kind of person that you expected to be when you first started dating. At the same time, you may also find yourself becoming a different person as the days go by.

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When the marriage ends, it is only logical for both parties to get a divorce. Even if you do not want to go on separate ways, you have no choice but to participate in the divorce proceedings. We understand that it can be challenging to survive this painful phase of your life, but you have to no choice but to move forward to better tomorrows. At first, everything will be too painful to the point that you will wallow in sadness and loneliness for months. However, you cannot let this situation go on for a long time. Otherwise, everything in your life will start to crumble down. Your relationship with the kids, as well as other people, may be affected. As Jennifer Baxt, LMFT, LMHC explains, “Divorce is not something that should never be entered into lightly. It means an end to that relationship and the breakup of a family, which can be greatly traumatizing to the children of that marriage.”

Fortunately, there are tons of ways on how you can get going despite the divorce. Make sure that you know and familiarize yourself with these strategies so that it will be easier on your part to overcome the situation. Here are some of the smart things to do:

 

Forgive Yourself

The first thing that you must do is to forgive yourself for all your shortcomings and failures in the marriage. Stop blaming yourself for what happened because it will only lead to depression or extreme sadness. The best thing to do is to recognize your mistakes and accept them wholeheartedly. Take note that there is nothing that you can do to change the past. Learn to forgive yourself so that you can move on quickly. Do not let your self-pitying thoughts bring you down.

 

Accept The Situation

Another thing that you must do is to start talking about your divorce to other people. Stop pretending that everything in your marriage is okay or that you are still in the process of working things out with your ex. Keep in mind that the relationship ended for a reason. Remind yourself of this reason every single day until you start to accept the situation. Take note that denial will only make things harder for you and your children. As such, it is recommended to start discussing to your friends and family members about the divorce. The more you discuss or talk about it, the easier it would be on your part to accept the reality. Donna M. White, LMHC, CACP once stated that “Many times I have heard couples say, “We know what’s wrong, but we just don’t know how to fix it.”. This is a perfect time to get a third party involved. If a couple is stuck, a skilled clinician may be able to get them moving in the right direction.”

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Go On A Vacation

Do not be afraid to treat yourself to a quick vacation to a place that you have always wanted to visit. Make sure that you take this trip as an opportunity to reconnect with yourself. “Vacations are coping mechanisms that help us adapt to the everyday stresses in our lives.” John Mayer, PhD said. Enjoy a moment of solitude to a place that is far away from your home. When you do this, you are exposing yourself to a different world. Somehow, it will make you feel more excited about the things that will unfold in your life now that you are divorced. Aside from this, the vacation will also make you realize that it is possible to be happy without your husband.

 

Go On Therapy Sessions

Another thing that you can consider is to seek professional help. All you have to do is to look for a licensed therapist in your area and book for an appointment. If you are not comfortable or interested in face-to-face meetings, you can also try online therapy services. The choice depends on your personal preferences. Do not worry because every information, story, and experience that you will share to the therapist will be confidential. As such, he is not allowed to talk about it to other people.

 

Focus On Yourself

Now that you are officially divorced from your husband, it is high time to start caring for yourself. Keep in mind that you spent the past few years taking good care of the marriage. Since it already ended, the best thing to do is to begin loving yourself even more. Go get a makeover and do all the things that can you feel more beautiful than ever. Aside from this, you can also start looking for a new passion. Keep yourself busy, but make sure that everything you do will make you feel a lot better.

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Remember that you have what it takes to overcome the divorce.